We Cant Be Friends....Maybe We could Start Off as Friends?...At Least...

Ok so...relationships are so easy to want, but so hard to make work. When do you just let yourself go? How do you decide whether or not he is "the one". Is dating and being in a relationship the same thing? Its just not fair.

I am the type of person who needs alot of time to get to know someone before I decide that I want to be with them. How is it that you meet me and know, Im the one? I dont have tht kind of psychic power. I am also the type to panic when things move to fast. Thus my current situation.

We met, exchanged numbers and the rest was history. A month and a half goes by and i feel like we're in a relationship. Dont get me wrong all of the perks that you bring are great but those are things that a boyfriend does. I appreciate it all but now I feel obligated to return the favor when in my book, we're doing to much.

Sure, you say, why don't you just tell him that? When a guy wont allow you to pay for anything and insists on driving miles and miles to come visit you at a whim, it gets hard to jus say "hey, i need some space". And when I finally do get uo the nerve to say it, it back fires in my face. He says "I'll fall back. Good night". And thats that.

How does that work? I say i need some space and he cuts me off from life. Then when I finally get a response hes telling me how he doesnt want to be taken advantage of, and how its all or nothing becasue he has too much feeling for me. Its just a hard situation. Other women may kill for a guy like that and I could see why. But thats not what im used to.

Im used to being the one doing all the driving. Im used to being the one buying all the food, cooking all the time doing whatever it is he needs/wants. So for him to say he doesnt wana be taken advantage of sucks, because Im used to being the giver, so if anyone appreciates him I would.

I would like for us to take it down a few notches to develop our friendship more but he wants nothing to do with that possibility of being friends. This is his idea of taking things slow. I dont want to lose a friend but I dont want to rush it either. So Im at a loss right now. No matter what I say to him, I dont think he'll ever understand where im coming from. Theres no compromise and that hurts too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OGtIf4Q6_1o

What makes this hard is the fact that yes, one should go after their best interest and guard their own heart first. but whether or not you are hurting others in the process is what you hae to be careful of. What i realized is that we are both on two different levels of like. He fell for me after a week and Im still looking for the cliff. My next challenge is how im going to fix it. smh....Im usually good at giving good relationship advice..but man when you're in it...nothing seems to work. In order for me to work up to us being together, we have to be friends first. And hes making it so that we cant be friends . .....smh (n_n)