We Cant Be Friends....Maybe We could Start Off as Friends?...At Least...

Ok so...relationships are so easy to want, but so hard to make work. When do you just let yourself go? How do you decide whether or not he is "the one". Is dating and being in a relationship the same thing? Its just not fair.

I am the type of person who needs alot of time to get to know someone before I decide that I want to be with them. How is it that you meet me and know, Im the one? I dont have tht kind of psychic power. I am also the type to panic when things move to fast. Thus my current situation.

We met, exchanged numbers and the rest was history. A month and a half goes by and i feel like we're in a relationship. Dont get me wrong all of the perks that you bring are great but those are things that a boyfriend does. I appreciate it all but now I feel obligated to return the favor when in my book, we're doing to much.

Sure, you say, why don't you just tell him that? When a guy wont allow you to pay for anything and insists on driving miles and miles to come visit you at a whim, it gets hard to jus say "hey, i need some space". And when I finally do get uo the nerve to say it, it back fires in my face. He says "I'll fall back. Good night". And thats that.

How does that work? I say i need some space and he cuts me off from life. Then when I finally get a response hes telling me how he doesnt want to be taken advantage of, and how its all or nothing becasue he has too much feeling for me. Its just a hard situation. Other women may kill for a guy like that and I could see why. But thats not what im used to.

Im used to being the one doing all the driving. Im used to being the one buying all the food, cooking all the time doing whatever it is he needs/wants. So for him to say he doesnt wana be taken advantage of sucks, because Im used to being the giver, so if anyone appreciates him I would.

I would like for us to take it down a few notches to develop our friendship more but he wants nothing to do with that possibility of being friends. This is his idea of taking things slow. I dont want to lose a friend but I dont want to rush it either. So Im at a loss right now. No matter what I say to him, I dont think he'll ever understand where im coming from. Theres no compromise and that hurts too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OGtIf4Q6_1o

What makes this hard is the fact that yes, one should go after their best interest and guard their own heart first. but whether or not you are hurting others in the process is what you hae to be careful of. What i realized is that we are both on two different levels of like. He fell for me after a week and Im still looking for the cliff. My next challenge is how im going to fix it. smh....Im usually good at giving good relationship advice..but man when you're in it...nothing seems to work. In order for me to work up to us being together, we have to be friends first. And hes making it so that we cant be friends . .....smh (n_n)

I Don't Remember....

Ok so...R&B "singer" Ciara is planning her release of "Fanatsy Ride" May 5th. Thats great for her becasue she's been out of the scene for a minute since "get up" and "like a boy". Now people go on for days about how shes manly looking or what have you. Thats not my issue. I think that Ciara is a beautiful young lady. I pay more attention to singing and lyrics, if anything.

If you have read my last post you know that I looooove music. I listen to lyrics just as much as I listen out for whether or not the artist is doing something spectacular vocally. I must say that Ciara is not as bad as Ashanti but I have yet to hear her really siiiiiiing. She seems to live in the wisper world, where her good looks and crazy dance moves can get her by. Thats fine. And shes also had some nice collabos recently like "Never Ever" featuring Young Jeezy and "Love and Sex and Magic" feat. Justin Timberlake. Those are great, well "never Ever" isn't my favorite but whatever. Collabos like these are great for artists like Ciara. But im skeptical about the album coming up.

You're probably asking, "ok...whats your point Breezy gosh I dont have all day I gotta send out my taxes..." Being a stikler for lyrics I couldnt help but notice a song of hers called "I dont remember". I dont believe its on her album and that was a smart move. Its an okay song but its just...not cutting it for me. Its very repetitive (As are many songs nowadays). I dont know, maybe im just being harsh but im just not feeling the magic with this record.

"What did I say...to him last night I can't feel face, trynna focus but my mind ain't right I remember the party, the DJ, my homies, my man and me But the rest of it's blurry, Something I did made my baby go away. Got the same clothes on today That I had on yesterday What did I do, what I say Man I don't remember Guess I had to much to drink 'Cause I don't remember "
(for full lyrics visit http://www.metrolyrics.com/dont-remember-lyrics-ciara.html)

"Get Up" made me want to well...get up! (lol) "One, Two Step" had me moving, it had everybody moving. "Just Can't Leave Him Alone" made me miss my boo boo. You know how that song "Blame It" by Jamie Foxx makes you want to go out and get twisted just so you can have a reason to act a fool and sing the song? Yea well "Don't Remember" doesnt make me wana go out and drink so much that I black out. Im just saying. Better luck next time Ci Ci. Love Y'all (*v*)

Oh Music...where would I be without you??

I love music. How such a beautiful thing comes from such a vicious industry I have no idea. I know being an artist seems like the perfect life but as the saying goes "all that glitters isnt gold." That makes me sad becasue I used to dream of being a superstar (Beyonce/Oprah). I have come to grips with the fact that its harder than it looks.

The constant traveling, the never ending demand for new material, delaing with the public? All of these things I can imagine take a toll on one person. Much power to the individual performer.

On the other hand I think I could see why one would put up with such a demanding career. Music relates to everything in life. Music is therapy and its inspiration. Imagine how you felt when you lost your favorite cd. That feeling is not just how you feel when you lose things. That feeling is how you feel when you have lost a part of you. That cd was more than just a disk. It was your shoulder to cry on when you broke up with Billy; It was your life's soundtrack.

So in choosing such a tedious road, you are doing more thanjust doing what you love, you are making millions of friends around the world. You are helping someone get through a tough situation. You are filling that void for someone out there.

Artists of the world, I commend you. Thank you for making me believe that it really was his fault (I shoulda Cheated- Keyshia Cole). Thank you for making me proud to be a woman and glad im not a man (Single Ladies-Beyonce). Thank you for reminding that it is going to be okay at the end of the day (Lyfe 268-192(album)-Lyfe Jennings). You guys are awesomelicious. (*v*)

Indroducing "Kanye-aid"

There you have it ladies and gentlemen, the producer turned rapper, turned singer, turned fashion designer is now also an energy drink..umm..er. Kanye West is currently in collaboration with GURU an energy drink company who is devoted to producing (like Kanye) an energy drink that corresponds with the healthy organic, no preservative, "go green" lifestyle of this day and age.

The drink is supposed to launch later on this year in the US and Canada. Now we the people will be able to get "Stronger" while living the "Good Life" sipping on that good ole' "Kanye-aid". There is not an official name for the drink yet but as you can see i think it should be aptly named, well, Kanye-aid.

The Hip Hop superstar is also coming out with a perfume very soon. Not only will he be making it rain, but it will smell Kan-licious too. Mr. West? If you want any more suggestions for product names, I have ideas for days...(*v*)

I Did'nt Know I was Pregnant!!!

Okay so, today at practice we were talking about the "rare" cases in which women have babies, but didnt know they were pregnant before the birth of the child. Insane right? Wrong this really happens. Look it up on youtube. Its crazy. Theres a show on Discovery Health called "i did't know I was pregnant". Now, if theres a whole show on it you know it happens alot. My thing is the doctors these women were dealing with are a little off. If I go to the doctor because I am having cripling back pains, frequently crave oreos, fried fish and polly-o cheese; and missed my period for 7 months and the doctor tells me its just gas...somethings wrong.

Some cases are more serious where the women were deemed infertile, have had an ovarian cyst or other serious medical issue. Them I can understand not expecting a baby. God bless them for it being a child and not an advancement of some serious disease. But for the women who are simply obese and unaware of their being in the third trimester becasue of it? Give me a break. You have some who women think that they're constsipated, or having bad gas. Sweety, Gas does not kick!!

As a result we have numerous childeren walking around whose mothers dread the day when they ask about the day they were born. "Mommy? what was it like when you had me? Mom: Well sweety, mommy didnt know she was having you until the day you got here. Child:So where did you have me? Mom: Right in the toilet, isnt that funny sweety? Child: Im a....toiletbowl baby??..." Its a shame but a blessing nonetheless. Alot of these babies still manage to come out healty and normal and thats all that matters. (However, if you were born in a toiletbowl I may think i was better than you..just a little bit. No hard feelings tho. lol)

Im only Joking. But ladies please, if you are sexually active and you are NOT ready for childbearing. Please, please PLEASE use protection. Make sure the condom is new and not expired. Make sure that if you are on birth control that you STILL use a condom, heres why:
1. If you dont use a condom or any type of birth control you have an 85% chance of getting pregnant.
2. If you only use the pill, you have a 1% chance of getting pregnant
3. If you use only the male condom (yes there's female condoms) you have a 3% chance of getting pregnant
4. If you use the "pull out" method you have a 4% chance of getting pregnant
Dont believe me go to the site for yourself! http://www.fda.gov/Fdac/features/1997/conceptbl.html

We must take care of ourselves in this day and age ladies because no one else will. Love Ya (*v*)

I NEEEED my Phone....Seriously

Okay so Monday morning I tried to make a phone call and my call was redirected by my service provider (Verizon) to a service representative. My phone bill is past due and they suspended my service. Im going to pay it, however, I cant get to a bank until 230! That means I have no cell phone for almost half of a whole day.

Please try to understand the severity of this situation. I cant text, or call anyone for five hours. Like many people my age I am very attached to my phone. I text more than I do anything else in a day. My phone (the LG Voyager) is my portal to the world and my only form of communication with life!!!

As previously stated I am not the only one who suffers from "phonelessness". If you go to Google and search "I cant live without my phone" You see a host of blogs and sites from people who just simply cant live without it.

Imagine waking up without your ability to speak. Yes, it is like that. You cant communicate with anoyne anywhere. You feel disoriented and all alone never to see the light of day again. I remember losong my phone and being without it for a wole week. IN-SANE. I named it phonelious and morned it publically via facebook.

My advice to you all is to pay your bill as on-time as possible because they will excommunicate you frm the world!!!

There IS a Central Jersey!

Ok people...the big question of the week is: Is there a Central Jersey??? I say YES there is. Everywhere from Trenton to Woodbridge is Central Jersey. Many like to believe that there is only a north and a south and thats it. NO NO NO!!! I am currently in New Brunswick..and I am in Central Jersey!!

Welcome to my humble...blog

Well its been a long time coming...im finally here....I hope you all will hop on board as I begin my journey to becoming....Oprah...lol I just wana say welcome..n lets talk sometime ya know? Because i like to talk...i can talk allll day if you want.....

**So yea...enjoy your day...but more importantly...enjoy your stay...haha (*v*)